Loudon Wainwright III - The Acid Song

I had not taken acid for twelve years,
But one night last summer i did.
I was adrift in a bar room,
Acting like a jerk and a kid.

I knew we were asking for trouble,
Trouble was what we would get.
Five of us dropped in the girls' room,
Psycadilisized insane quintet.

Well that bathroom got crowded in no time,
Our minds were all blown in one flash,
Everyone in there got ugly,
We exited out of there fast.

Back in the bar we were happy,
Feeling great, no problem,
Back in the bar we were fine.
Till johnny turned into a nazi,
And mary threw up all her wine.

Well in no time we all were ejected,
Soon we were out on the street.
The sidewalk began to perspire,
We had glass and dog shit at our feet.

We went over to mary's apartment
Come on!
To listen to the grateful dead.
On the way there we lost johnny,
He had opted for bellevue instead.

Well i'm really glad we did this, it feels great.
Just like the old days, i love this.
I know my hair's on fire, it's like incense or something.
You know, your face is melting,
It is, it's all the colours of the rainbow.

Hey you wanna hold some fruit?
Come on, hold some fruit!
It breeds, it really does!
Have a cantaloupe, come on.
Ah, no i dunno where the donovan tape is.

Well i had to get out of that city,
Bobby was bringing me down.
Me and my darling young susie,
Said so long and drove out of town.

Driving on acid is easy
Driving on acid's a breeze.
Just keep the car on the highway
Don't laugh and don't fart and don't sneeze.

Oh we got to my house in the country
In the country man
The trees were all throbbing and green
Susie was sure she had cancer
I was sure i was james dean

We went down the lake to go swimming
Come on let's try it out
Down to the lake for a swim
Susie said, "water cures cancer"
I asked her to please call me jim.

Yes acid is usually dangerous
The mild-mannered can quickly turn mean
Lsd can surely derange us
Unless you possess thorazine

So next time you wanna go out there
When you feel like fitting your head
Think twice before dropping acid
Hold out for mushrooms instead!